An urgent and horrifying news story
This afternoon we’re going to make a pretty big announcement. You know, in the scope of a Minor League Baseball team. It’s not like we’re finding the cures to all sorts of medical ailments or anything, but I think people will be impressed.
And no, we’re not becoming a Triple-A franchise. Don’t be ridiculous.
(Not that it’s the worst guess of all time)…
Let your imaginations run wild!